Thread pissing contests

alanmcorcoran · 09-09-2010, 04:17 PM

I suppose to some extent that some participation is better than no participation, but I wanted to state (for just me personally, obviously) I do NOT find the endless bickering over who said what and how they said it and who is a jerk, etc. that a lot of these threads descend into amusing. It's not only a waste of time when I click to read these new "posts" but I also think it discourages (new) people from participating and reduces our little community to the same half dozen voices.

I realize that by posting this, I am inviting the exact sort of activity I am asking to cease, but it seems lately, some people are suggesting that this is a "fun" thing that we all consider some sort of badge of honor. In my case, I think it doesn't add much to the site.

To be clear, I am not talking about the good natured teasing (of Sarris and his Harley or me and my Yamaha) or people voicing their various beliefs on pipes, ATTGATT, etc. I'm talking more about the personal vitriol that goes on and on and no one seems to be man enough to stop responding.

Sarris · 09-09-2010, 05:02 PM

:plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1:

mrlmd1 · 09-09-2010, 05:22 PM

I feel the same way, but I also don't especially like being attacked or demeaned if I ask for someone, anyone, to explain a post they made to educate me as well as everyone else, instead of just accepting what is sometimes really spouted-out bullshit and opinion rather than factual knowledge. I'll try and let that stuff slide but it's not always correct, and if you guys want to accept that kind of stuff as gospel, then go right ahead. And FYI, I didn't start this whole thing, it came about somewhere over a year ago in a discussion about batteries where you know who just had to put in a valueless comment that was not only inappropriate but wrong, as well as derogatory, and it pops up again every once in a while. That same thing has been directed at others too, some people either let it slide or are intimidated and don't fight back. Am I the only one who finds this behavior objectionable? I try and stand up for myself and will not tolerate that kind of behavior. Maybe I'll just vacate this forum and let you have him to yourself if you think that behavior is OK. He has been chastised on other forums too and banned from one. This is the last I have to say about this, I'm sure he'll respond in some nasty way, then it's done.

FYI- from another forum, same complaints from a number of members:
Originally Posted by Apertureguy View Post
that's what we need...an emote of someone beating a dead horse.

and the next response
hey that "smilie" reminds me of a lot of ER's arguments towards everything

Goodbye.

dhgeyer · 09-09-2010, 07:13 PM

I've participated in an awful lot of forums (fora?) over the last 15 years. There are always people who want or need to get into personal arguments. It seems the Internet doesn't always bring out the best in people.

I have been attacked pretty vigorously for my attitude sometimes, including early on in my participation in this forum by the same guy you keep tangling with. I've learned. Fighting back - defending your honor - trying to save face - or whatever you are trying to do never works. If you want people to respect you, the best thing you can do is to not respond in kind when personally attacked. People will always respect you more if you keep your mouth shut in those situations, hard though that may be.

ER and I are friends now. I'm glad I played it the way I did, and have in a couple of other cases with other people as well. It always works out better if you keep it positive, feel free to state your opinion on matters of substance, but never let it get personal, at least from your point of view.

music man · 09-09-2010, 08:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mrlmd1

Maybe I'll just vacate this forum and let you have him to yourself if you think that behavior is OK. He has been chastised on other forums too and banned from one. This is the last I have to say about this, I'm sure he'll respond in some nasty way, then it's done.

Goodbye.

I don't think you leaving is going to solve anything, so I would ask that you not do that, not that my one opinion probably matters to you but...

Water Warrior 2 · 09-09-2010, 08:35 PM

Yeah, stuff happens. In a perfect world it wouldn't but we don't live in a perfect world. None of us will ever be perfect but please lets try to be a little more civil to each other. Talking face to face with some one we do tend to say regretable things and can't take them back. Online we have the option of reading our words before posting and should give more thought to what we write and say to one another. The GZ forum is a one of a kind on this planet so let's not mess it up.
Before I enter any post I generally read it for context and check for oops'. I do try to read all posts with a smile on my face, yeah it does help but the odd time I really would like to smack some one. So I will do this: deep breath, hold it, count to 5....................one.....two.....three.......a n anudder one........an anudder one..........exhale. Now I can carry on. Works for me.

blaine · 09-09-2010, 09:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by music man

I don't think you leaving is going to solve anything, so I would ask that you not do that, not that my one opinion probably matters to you but...

:plus1:

Viirin · 09-09-2010, 10:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dhgeyer

I've participated in an awful lot of forums (fora?)

Haha - fori maybe? maybe not, I don't English so good

mrlmd1 · 09-09-2010, 11:20 PM

I hear what all of you are saying, it's better sometimes to let it slide, but when it continues I don't believe in ignoring piss-poor behavior. If it's ignored, it's like rewarding it because then it gets perpetuated because there is no punishment. You don't raise or treat your kids that way, I'm sure you don't tolerate that from them. Yeah, we're supposedly adults, but I think someone should be called out on this kind of thing that goes way beyond teasing, it's just nasty, so maybe it would stop if enough others find it objectionable. I'm not the only one on here who has been the brunt of this and this is not the only site he's on on which this occurs. But I will try to be less critical and maybe a little more tolerant, but will still excersize my right to call anyone out when I think they went over the line and are abusive. Anyone else is free to do this at any time, to whomever they feel acts that way. We'll see what happens and how this goes.

burkbuilds · 09-09-2010, 11:33 PM

Someone once wrote (this advice was about raising teenagers but it may still apply in general) that you should "pick your battles carefully and make certain that the

ones you choose to fight are actually worth fighting." (In respect to teenagers they also recommended that if you chose to fight you better win.)

I'd say that most of the "fighting" on here probably isn't worth the effort, just let it go. I really like this site over all, the petty stuff gets annoying sometimes though.

09-09-2010, 04:17 PM	#1
alanmcorcoran Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Anaheim, CA Posts: 2,926	Thread pissing contests I suppose to some extent that some participation is better than no participation, but I wanted to state (for just me personally, obviously) I do NOT find the endless bickering over who said what and how they said it and who is a jerk, etc. that a lot of these threads descend into amusing. It's not only a waste of time when I click to read these new "posts" but I also think it discourages (new) people from participating and reduces our little community to the same half dozen voices. I realize that by posting this, I am inviting the exact sort of activity I am asking to cease, but it seems lately, some people are suggesting that this is a "fun" thing that we all consider some sort of badge of honor. In my case, I think it doesn't add much to the site. To be clear, I am not talking about the good natured teasing (of Sarris and his Harley or me and my Yamaha) or people voicing their various beliefs on pipes, ATTGATT, etc. I'm talking more about the personal vitriol that goes on and on and no one seems to be man enough to stop responding. __________________ [hr:5yt6ldkq][/hr:5yt6ldkq] http://alanmarkcorcoran.com Motorcycles, Music, Musings and More… Login or Register to Remove Ads
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09-09-2010, 05:02 PM	#2
Sarris Senior Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: New Port Richey, Florida USA Posts: 1,348	Re: Thread pissing contests :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: :plus1: __________________ Prudent riders live longer than moron riders.
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09-09-2010, 05:22 PM	#3
mrlmd1 Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Crawfordville, Florida Posts: 2,853	Re: Thread pissing contests I feel the same way, but I also don't especially like being attacked or demeaned if I ask for someone, anyone, to explain a post they made to educate me as well as everyone else, instead of just accepting what is sometimes really spouted-out bullshit and opinion rather than factual knowledge. I'll try and let that stuff slide but it's not always correct, and if you guys want to accept that kind of stuff as gospel, then go right ahead. And FYI, I didn't start this whole thing, it came about somewhere over a year ago in a discussion about batteries where you know who just had to put in a valueless comment that was not only inappropriate but wrong, as well as derogatory, and it pops up again every once in a while. That same thing has been directed at others too, some people either let it slide or are intimidated and don't fight back. Am I the only one who finds this behavior objectionable? I try and stand up for myself and will not tolerate that kind of behavior. Maybe I'll just vacate this forum and let you have him to yourself if you think that behavior is OK. He has been chastised on other forums too and banned from one. This is the last I have to say about this, I'm sure he'll respond in some nasty way, then it's done. FYI- from another forum, same complaints from a number of members: Originally Posted by Apertureguy View Post that's what we need...an emote of someone beating a dead horse. and the next response hey that "smilie" reminds me of a lot of ER's arguments towards everything Goodbye. Login or Register to Remove Ads
	0

09-09-2010, 07:13 PM	#4
dhgeyer Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Merrimack NH USA Posts: 722	Re: Thread pissing contests I've participated in an awful lot of forums (fora?) over the last 15 years. There are always people who want or need to get into personal arguments. It seems the Internet doesn't always bring out the best in people. I have been attacked pretty vigorously for my attitude sometimes, including early on in my participation in this forum by the same guy you keep tangling with. I've learned. Fighting back - defending your honor - trying to save face - or whatever you are trying to do never works. If you want people to respect you, the best thing you can do is to not respond in kind when personally attacked. People will always respect you more if you keep your mouth shut in those situations, hard though that may be. ER and I are friends now. I'm glad I played it the way I did, and have in a couple of other cases with other people as well. It always works out better if you keep it positive, feel free to state your opinion on matters of substance, but never let it get personal, at least from your point of view. __________________ 54 HD Hummer,64 Honda150,66 Ducati250,01 Vulcan500,02 Vulcan1500,83 Nighthawk650,91 K75,95 VLX,04 VLX,01 GS500E,01 Ninja250, 02 Rebel,04 Ninja500,06 Concours,96 R850R
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09-09-2010, 08:35 PM	#6
Water Warrior 2 Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Squamish B.C Canada Posts: 11,409	Re: Thread pissing contests Yeah, stuff happens. In a perfect world it wouldn't but we don't live in a perfect world. None of us will ever be perfect but please lets try to be a little more civil to each other. Talking face to face with some one we do tend to say regretable things and can't take them back. Online we have the option of reading our words before posting and should give more thought to what we write and say to one another. The GZ forum is a one of a kind on this planet so let's not mess it up. Before I enter any post I generally read it for context and check for oops'. I do try to read all posts with a smile on my face, yeah it does help but the odd time I really would like to smack some one. So I will do this: deep breath, hold it, count to 5....................one.....two.....three.......a n anudder one........an anudder one..........exhale. Now I can carry on. Works for me.
	0

09-09-2010, 11:20 PM	#9
mrlmd1 Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: Crawfordville, Florida Posts: 2,853	Re: Thread pissing contests I hear what all of you are saying, it's better sometimes to let it slide, but when it continues I don't believe in ignoring piss-poor behavior. If it's ignored, it's like rewarding it because then it gets perpetuated because there is no punishment. You don't raise or treat your kids that way, I'm sure you don't tolerate that from them. Yeah, we're supposedly adults, but I think someone should be called out on this kind of thing that goes way beyond teasing, it's just nasty, so maybe it would stop if enough others find it objectionable. I'm not the only one on here who has been the brunt of this and this is not the only site he's on on which this occurs. But I will try to be less critical and maybe a little more tolerant, but will still excersize my right to call anyone out when I think they went over the line and are abusive. Anyone else is free to do this at any time, to whomever they feel acts that way. We'll see what happens and how this goes.
	0

09-09-2010, 11:33 PM	#10
burkbuilds Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2009 Location: Shannon, Georgia Posts: 1,268	Re: Thread pissing contests Someone once wrote (this advice was about raising teenagers but it may still apply in general) that you should "pick your battles carefully and make certain that the ones you choose to fight are actually worth fighting." (In respect to teenagers they also recommended that if you chose to fight you better win.) I'd say that most of the "fighting" on here probably isn't worth the effort, just let it go. I really like this site over all, the petty stuff gets annoying sometimes though.
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