Wrightwood, CA

[alanmcorcoran]

Last year I managed to get out to the local hill six or seven times, so, this year, for the first time ever, I figured I'd pony up for the heavily discounted season pass (it's like $250 in August.) My wife did all the BS on-line, but you have to go up there to get your picture taken and actually collect the pass. I figured I'd do it now, before the snow starts, to avoid a line when I actually want to go skiing.

When I drive up, it's nearly 100% highway/freeway and I can do the 74 miles in about an hour. Wanted to ride on backroads, so I asked Google to set me a route. This turned out to be a mistake on several levels.

Ten or twelve miles in, I get turned around at Carbon Canyon. It's only opened to residents on account of a bunch of their houses burned down and local law enforcement is apparently concerned about looters or looky-loos. I'm a fifty year old man on a 250cc bike with no saddlebags. Not exactly a threat to make off with the plasma TV. But, then again LEO's are not the best people to reason with once they've made a decision about something. So, U-turned and turned on my ABPS. Twenty minutes and 6 freeway miles later, I was back on track.

The non-freeway pace was quite slow. Speed up to traffic light, stop, repeat. At about 2 hours in I finally hit a very lovely stretch of backways: Lytle Creek Road. Beautiful, slightly winding, through a canyon next to a creek, up through the mountains. NO LIGHTS! Very nice. Started to relax and think ride wasn't so bad after all. About 8 miles up the road, I hit the recommended turnoff - a very sharp right on Sheep Canyon road. 15 feet in I almost dumped Suzi - the road was deep, loose gravel. Not suitable for anything other than maybe a Hummer or a Jeep. Screwed by Google! There happened to be a local family on a hike/walk. The first thing they asked me was if I had used MapQuest to get up Lytle Creek. Told me there's no way to get to Wrightwood from Lytle Creek. Back to the freeway. Cost me about 30 minutes total. Got on the 15, (the regular way I usually go) to the 138, etc. and got to Mountain High's season pass office at 4:30 - three and a half hours.

My ass had gone past the point of numb. Learned a new trick. If you stand on the pegs you can push the back of your ass up against the back seat and get some relief underneath. Rode quite a bit of the last half hour or so like that.

My ass being in the condition it was, darkness having set in, and there being no real back way back, I decided that being a pussy is a relative thing: I strapped on a pair, said to myself (a la O'Reilly) "Eff it, we're taking the effing freeway!" Hauled ass down the mountain (it was COLD up there, like 40!), onto the 138, onto the 15 and onto the 91. 74 miles of straight ass- hauling: bouncing, grooves, scallops, wind buffeting, trucks, debris, chuckholes, BE DAMNED. I was NOT going to drag my ass through Rancho Cucamonga, Fontana, Upland, Ontario, Chino, Diamond Bar, Brea, East Butthole, etc. for another three hours.

Got home in about 85 minutes give or take, including a stop for gas, power bar and coffee. What with the detour, my 150 mile ride ended up being closer to 160, but by the end of it, I feel like I have moved a little closer to being a regular biker.